Parenting advice from me and Helen

That's going to be the title of my parenting book. Catchy, yes? Helen is the greatest. Her house is almost as messy as mine, so that makes her about my favorite person. That, plus her charm and good looks, of course. I'm not one of those shallow, superficial people who only likes someone because of her messy house. We were at the playground the other day and Weston and her son, Jack, were drawing on the slides with crayons, and there was a very disapproving-looking mom looking on. You know the one, with squinchy eyes and frowny-mouth. Neither of us had a wipe or any other means to clean off the slide, but graffiti is art now, right? I hear it might even be an Olympic sport soon. Take that, Squinchy Sue! Anyway, we got to talking about cleaning up crayon marks and I learned something new: It is impossible to clean up crayon marks off the wall if they have been licked on. Even if the crayon is washable. She learned this the other day- she got out of the shower to find that her daughter had drawn on all the walls, then chewed up the crayon, then licked the walls. The drawings cleaned right up, but the tongue marks remain, despite vigorous scrubbing. With experience like that, she is obviously highly qualified to give parenting advice, and I can recommend her blog 'Tips from the Trenches' without reservation. I can smell the royalty payments now. Burgundy cowhide coats for everyone!