Planet Birthday

When Weston woke up on his birthday, he got his birthday present: a Vtech Kidizoom camera. It's a digital camera for kids, and it is supposed to be indestructible. The pictures it takes aren't that great, but it also takes lousy movies and has some crappy games. Weston loves it. Then, we got dressed and went to the diner on base, Checkertails, for ham and eggs, french fries and pancakes. Then off to the BX for supplies to finish the solar system cake, and a new not-indestructible camera for me.

When we got home, I frosted the sun, star, moon and planets. I went with the original nine, plus Charon, because Weston really likes Charon. Charon is Pluto's biggest moon, and some astronomers consider Pluto and Charon a double planet system because Charon is almost as big as Pluto. That can be your astronomy lesson for today. There will be a quiz the next time you talk to Weston. After they were frosted, Weston placed the sunspots (Hershey's Kisses), solar flares (gummy apply circles) and the corona (candy corn) on the sun, and put the volcanoes on the appropriate planets. The volcanoes were cherry slice gumdrops and pomegranate jelly beans (Good for you! Full of antioxidants! The package actually says that).

We covered the cake up to wait for the party, the sitter came over and I headed to the thrift store. I hit the jackpot, too. There was a beautiful keyboard and stand for Weston and a puke green Oscar the Grouch fleece pullover for Shane. Lloyd came home early to help get ready for the party, and he brought a turtle. His name is Turtle, and he eats some kind of dried bugs that come in a can. Then, our guests started arriving and all kinds of great chaos ensued. There were broken dishes, play doh and frosting smeared on the floor, legos flung across the room, and shrieking galore. And that was just Lloyd. Of course, I am lying. Lloyd was actually cowering in a closet sucking down beers. There wasn't enough room for both of us, so I had to keep my beer in a ziploc bag in my pocket. I snaked some rubber tubing up under my bra and kept it tucked away for when I needed a good honk. Yes, I am lying again. Put down the phone: Child Protective Services is not interested in your tall tales anyway.

When everyone went home and it was quiet, I sat down with Weston to tell him about the day he was born. I was telling him how happy we were to see him and he said, 'Can I have some milk now?'