By Jennifer age 37 ¾
I am Anna’s sister and while I am not as clever as her, I am pretty cool anyway. I am a married artist mom who works from home with 2 kids Paloma, 4 and Theodore 4 months. My website is www.jennifermcneely.com
Today I mopped the floor. I even took a picture. It left me with a sense of accomplishment and also a bit relieved. I do not usually mop floors. Unless like if something like oh...say... projectile vomit or dog urine or both ends up on the floor, then yes, of course! Usually, I mean. Up until 3 weeks ago, I have had a cleaner come to my house for the last 4 (YES 4!) years. It started as a gift, a lovely gift, from my friend Barrett. Once the gift ended, it was like having your eyebrows waxed, I couldn't go back to doing it myself, and I just couldn’t!
Fast Forward to TODAY As my nearly 4 month old has not really taken to the bottle and I have not been able to work very much, I decided to do the prudent thing, after carefully examining what could be cut form the budget, NOT my goodwill money, I assure you! I had to let them go. It was a sad call for both of us, but thanks to W and friends. I have to be financially savvy these days. I decided that I would make a list of the things that they were doing and try to fit it in during the week, bathroom, floors, and tubs. Dust. Until now, I’ve had no problem with the dusting, or bathrooms, but the floors are a different story, somehow it represents something so housewifery to me, so ... umm.... mom-esque.
There, I've said it.
When I was pregnant with my first child I remember very clearly a trip to shop for spendy baby gear to
Either way, it really affirmed for me my FEAR of “mommy hood” did you really lose yourself and start eating nuggets for dinner??? It would never happen to me, I vowed. In fact, I was not even worried. I hate those little fish crackers.
It was with the second child that my illusion shattered. Now as I type this, I've really developed a taste for cheese crackers, (especially with a little red wine, but I’d caution you to go easy on it, as this combo while delish can be quite shall we say.. “plugging”). I am wearing what I call my “dress” sweats, and as of yet today, have not brushed my teeth. It’s not overalls with mickey mouse, but its pretty close!
I’m hopeful that I will find as time goes on it gets easier. I m hopeful I’ll still reach those goals that are important to me outside being someone’s mommy, like getting in the biennale or fiber arts like my friend Diem Chau (who rocks, BTW). And getting to wear my old clothes again!
SO many things have changed since I made the cliff jumping leap into mommy hood and I would not change it for anything. Its thrilling, exciting and really actually fun. Its life and death changing forever type stuff. But it’s the everyday chores I find exhausting, the thought that as soon as I complete my “list” I get to sleep (maybe) then (yeah!) do it all over again tomorrow! This is why I hate to mop.
But this time as I was mopping, something was different. Maybe I've learned something or maybe the fight has been beaten out of me. Whatever it was, I found that I felt relieved to just mop the floor. I feel its nice to not feel the pressure to PRODUCE for awhile, and for now maybe mopping floors and making photo albums is what I m supposed to be doing. I don’t have to run out and get in shape, get the biennial or get a grant, or even have shiny hair, all I have to do is make milk and mop floors. So thanks George W Bush! I feel a little better.
Jennifer, guest blogger